Blog #10 – Laughs, Hugs, and Tears

By Brenna Cohoon

My last cross country state meet came and went just as quickly as the rest of the season.  It was a weekend filled with lots of laughs, hugs, and tears.

We began the weekend in good spirits, as our school celebrated our departure with a state send-off involving students, staff, and the marching band.  We then boarded our creatively decorated mini-buses and headed on our way to Peoria.

Pulling up to the course a few hours later, I could already feel the energy that constantly penetrates Detweiller Park, especially during the weekend of the state meet.  On our easy run, I took in every little bit of the course, from the hard, packed-in ground at some points to the tight turns around multiple corners.  During our strides into the finish line, I visualized the finish of my race, focusing on pumping my arms and running up on my toes.  The following day was going to be the 13th time I’ve raced at Detweiller, and I smiled with excitement as I pictured how the meet would unfold.

Unfortunately, the following day did not live up to my personal expectations, and in many ways, fell short of our team’s goals, too.  The race went a little something like this:

The whistle blew and the gun went off; everyone peeled off of the starting line to begin chasing their dreams.  I went out at a bit of a conservative pace, trusting my instinct and knowing that I could pick things up as soon as I made the first turn.  I ended up getting boxed in at the bottom of the hill and noticed a few girls near me fall while making that turn.  

As I approached the main straightaway, I felt someone step on the back of my left spike.  I panicked, realizing that my heel came out of my shoe; this was exactly what happened the week before in the Sectional race!  I thought that was a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence, but apparently not.  But the odds of it happening two weeks in a row, in two of the most important races of the season?  Pretty low, that’s for sure.

I needed to keep moving.  I kicked the rest of my shoe off and pushed up the hill, letting my rush of adrenaline carry me.  I couldn’t let this unfortunate situation prevent me from striving towards my goals.  I’ve raced with one spike before, so I knew I could do it again.

Although the ground was hard, it didn’t really bother my foot until I had to run over rocks while heading into the back triangle.  I had to put my mind over matter right then and there.  I knew that things weren’t trending in my favor, but I tried to maintain a strong, positive mindset throughout that second mile.

When I hit a mile to go, I knew I needed to leave everything I had out there on the course.  I did not want to leave Peoria with any regrets.  It was hard to fully grip the ground going into the finish, but I did what I could.

Still, I started sobbing as soon as I crossed the finish line.  14th place in 17:06 was not what I had in mind for my senior year state meet.  I wanted to finish in the top five and run a huge PR.  Unfortunately, that was not meant to be.

To make matters worse, I was disappointed when I heard that our team ended up finishing 5th.  We had aspirations of placing in the top three for the second consecutive year, but again, that was not meant to be.  Some of my teammates required medical attention following the race, and others simply didn’t get to execute the race plans they were hoping to run.  It just so happened that a few of us struggled in our races at the same exact time: State.

Despite receiving comfort and encouragement from my teammates, coaches, and family, I couldn’t help but feel as though I let down my team.   I was extremely hard on myself in the hours following the race.  I should have run a better race closer to the front.  My shoe coming off shouldn’t have affected me as much as it ultimately did.  I should have been a better teammate, a stronger captain. 

I woke up on Sunday, still feeling down about the results of State.  To make matters worse, my foot was sore and bruised.  I trudged through the morning fighting negative, self-deprecating comments running through my head.

Things switched about halfway through the day.  I started to realize that what people were telling me was the truth.  Everyone who said they were proud of me were being honest.  They were proud of how I fought through the circumstances dealt to me.  Late Sunday afternoon, I finally decided to feel the same way.  I remembered I still have opportunities for redemption: NXR and Footlocker Regionals.

As for the team, we all know that Saturday did not reflect what we are capable of doing.  It was just a series of unfortunate situations.  A lot of things happened that we could not control, and now, it’s our job to respond to the things we can control.  

Heading into NXR this weekend, we could not be more excited.  We are ready to get back out there again; we are hungry for more.  I am proud of all that we’ve accomplished throughout the season and cannot wait to see how everything plays out in Terre Haute.

This is a big opportunity, and we are prepared to accept the challenge.

This time with BOTH shoes on!

Photo: © 2019 Laura Duffy